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Tue, Jan. 16th, 2007, 04:58 pm
I miss him :( Seeing him everyday then randomly during the week not is so hard. Oh well I have to get used to it. There will be plenty of other days where I won't get to see him. Completely failed on my fast. I guess it's just not for me. Oh well. I will find other ways. Just had a ciggarette and lied about it to him. And I'm even stupid enough to want another one. I want to quit I seriously do I just..Don't have the strenght for it at the moment. I know he will be with me through it but I can't stand how much it makes me eat and how cranky I am towards him. Hurting him kills me.We've been together for almost three weeks and have only gotten into one arguement. I don't want to fuck this relationship up. I'm going to put all my energy into it. I can't lose someone I care for this much again..It's happned far to many times.
Wed, Jan. 17th, 2007, 12:58 am
![[info]](http://img.greatestjournal.com/userinfo.gif) still_here_4_u
seeing the guy... hmm... I can relate. The guy I dated the end of last school year and part of the summer... he talks to me now. I was finally okay with the fact that he ditched me completely. Now he talks to me. And I die a little each time, but I'll get over it with time. You know? What doesn't kill us only makes us stronger... or makes us kill ourselves. lol. Love ya. Wed, Jan. 17th, 2007, 01:12 am
still_here_4_u
I am the exact same way as you. Exact. So many people have let me down in life, I just give up before they have a chance to hurt me now... It sucks. Wed, Jan. 17th, 2007, 01:16 am
scorned_shadow
Oh yea I do that a lot. I tell whoever it is I'm with that they will probably find someone they like better than me or realize I'm not worth the stress or worry because most of the time I'm really upset and can't open up to people that easily so It makes it even harder to deal with me. After my going on like an idiot is done and there swearing it won't happen I give it a week and normally like clockwork they are breaking up with me. I have a really good intuition about relationships. I haven't been wrong about one yet. Wed, Jan. 17th, 2007, 01:24 am
still_here_4_u
yeah... I understand. IT sucks too... because like... you know it's going to end but you really don't want it to because you want for at least one thing in your life to be stable... then, it's over and for some reason, it still hurts like hell. Wed, Jan. 17th, 2007, 01:29 am
scorned_shadow
Yea and I find myself trying to hurry the ending process along because I feel like if i predict it's going to happen it won't hurt me as much when it does finally happen. It hasn't stopped the hurt at all yet. I don't know why I can just let things be and flow. I have to pick at everything. Wed, Jan. 17th, 2007, 01:31 am
still_here_4_u
me too. Relationships are like scabs waiting to be scratched at so that they can bleed all over the place. And sadly, even the smallest scabs bleed. I guess that's my gross way of saying, even meaningless relationships hurt when they end. Wed, Jan. 17th, 2007, 01:40 am
scorned_shadow
That way wasn't gross at all. Your completely right. Even stupid relationships you know are never going to work still hurt when they end. I hate it so much. I've even gotten my heart broken by a girl who didn't even go out with me. I just liked her so damn much and she led me on, Played with my heart then dropped me and started going out with this other girl. Now she comes to me for advice on there relationship(well they are broken up now,so advice on what to do) It hurts to much. Wed, Jan. 17th, 2007, 01:42 am
still_here_4_u
Yes. I've been there and done that too. Hannah, my first girl love, lead me on. Still leads me on, but I let her... because I love her still.. :-( Well sorry to cut our convo short but I've got to get off of here. Love ya. Have a good night. Wed, Jan. 17th, 2007, 01:47 am
scorned_shadow
It's alright. It was a very good convo :-). Have a good night as well hun Love u too. |
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